Well that's awkward....

On my way to work today I had one of those moments that I think we have all experienced. One of those moments where you share an awkward moment with someone. The 4 way stop moment where two cars, sometimes three, pull up to a stop sign at the same exact moment. You all look at each other, maybe you both wave each other through at the same time. Nine times out of ten you go and the other person decides to go as well at which time you both slam on your brakes and share a half "haha" half annoyed smile. Usually I end the ordeal by either accepting the wave and just gunning it or by giving an irritated wave of my hand with an audible "will you go already?". Today I didn't have the patience to be nice so I went at the first sign of a wave from the opposition. Anyway, this got me thinking of other moments in life that are equally if not more awkward.

This one also happened to me today. The radio in my car is broken so I have to listen to music through my phone. Well here I am listening to the radio, jamming out when all of a sudden the music stops. But my singing doesn't. Its not often that your embarrassed with no one around to even care but this is one of those moments. When the sound of your own voice makes you cringe it's time to withdraw your entry to be the next American idol. I will formally apologize to Bruno Mars. I do not sound anything like you Bruno and I'm sorry for ruining your song. That being said, don't ever ask me to do karaoke unless everyone in the room is either tone deaf or extremely drunk. Pearl Jam on the other hand? I swear to god I can sing just like Eddie Vedder. Why are you laughing? You don't believe me do you?

A few weeks back at work, and this was clearly my fault but whatever, I was coming out of the bathroom. To head back to my desk I have to take a left, usually I cut the corner a little close (obviously because I love my job and just can't wait to get back to work). Well how many times have you done this only to either barely miss someone coming from the opposite direction or completely crash into the corner of the wall? Usually I'm the one running into the wall. Not today however. Today as I sped around the corner, someone else was heading right at me. Both of us had our heads down. I was empty handed. My combatant however came at me with a fully loaded cup of coffee. It didn't end well for me. Speechless and Completely drenched in coffee I start to walk back to my desk. Mr. Coffee, who I refer to now as douchebag, decided to cause a scene. "you know it was your fault bro!!!". That's all I heard from down the aisle near the puddle of whatever coffee didn't land on my expensive old navy khakis. This didn't sit well with me. Not so much that I am soaked, but the fact that he called me "bro". So I get up and say "I'm wearing your coffee. I don't care who's fault it is. And don't ever call me bro!". (I didn't really say that but it sounds much better than what I really said). I mumbled something under my breath then quickly left to go back home and change. That was a shitty morning.

The elevator is a place where many of us may have had some awkward moments. You have the one where you go to get out and someone is trying to get in at the same time. The one where you're in the front of the crowd and someone in the back has to get out. The one where someone farts and (never ever me by the way) and everyone has to suffer while trying to figure out who did it. My favorite one however is when you get in the elevator and hit the wrong floor by accident. It's always a floor no one is going to causing everyone to wait while the doors slowly open then slowly close. I always feel the need to apologize at that moment because I know that's when they want to punch me in the face.

There's millions of others that we suffer through on a daily basis. One I hate is trying to deal with a quiet talker. Asking someone "what?" once is fine but when you have to ask again it feels like your being rude because you have to ask louder as if not only do they talk quiet, but they're also deaf. Which they're not, which is why they yell what they were trying to say back at you. At that point I'd be perfectly fine with them throwing an "asshole" at the end of their sentence since that is exactly how I feel by that point.


Awkward moments are just that, awkward. But life wouldn't be nearly as fun or interesting without them. Great, stuck in an elevator. Who farted?